Guys can make girls crave for them…and here is how!
We guys have been hunter-gathers for hundreds of thousands of years. And even though we live in a civilized society today where we no longer live like that, our genetic predisposition still is to hunt. Hunt for food, gather berries, hunt animals, gather water and hunt for females. It is just how we are programmed.
But what happens when we actually catch the girl. Do we need to stay in this hunter mode and constantly chase her?
The answer is no and before we go into it, let me just tell why flipping the frame here is awesome and how being the one chased is actually great.
When you are in hunter mode, it means that you are chasing for something and that you need something out there that you crave for. When that is food, your mouth salivates and tell you to go find and eat the food. You find the food then and end your cravings.
The same thing happens in relationships, where we guys are the one craving the other side and are in perpetual hunter mode. Because we have the urge and the need to fulfill our needs.
But when you flip the frame, you become the reward and the girl needs to chase you to fulfill her cravings. To do that, we need to have a couple of things going for us. And in my experience, it is these 5 elements that will yield you the biggest reward.
Let me first tell you what grooming isn’t. This doesn’t mean that you need to shave your armpits every single day, that every hair on your body needs to be perfectly shaped and “pointing” in the same direction etc.
Grooming doesn’t mean having $1200 blazer or the newest hip shoes. Grooming simply means being clean cut and making sure that you respect the way you look.
This means that you need to shower regularly and I am talking to you Paul and your couch-potato habit of not showering every single day. This is a must, not only for the girls but for your sense of self-respect.
Simple grooming also involves a clean-cut beard, hair and clean clothes. And that’s it! Simple as that. Because it is not about the accessories, it’s about showing yourself first that you respect the way you look and feel like in your own skin. And by just showering regularly, having clean clothes and a clean cut beard and hair, you will be groomed like a man. And girls love this! They will want you more because you are showing to yourself and to her that you want yourself more, that you respect yourself more and that you are a high-value guy.
What kind of a style you will choose depends solely on you. But these are the prerequisites for any style out there.
2. Being flirty
Being flirty is not only about the chase and stage where you don’t have the girl yet. You can use flirting even when you are in a relationship and dating a girl.
Flirting can be divided into two categories: words and behaviors.
Being flirty with words
Spark that interaction in a way that you show her that you are playful with your words. Make it appear that she can’t have you or that she can’t have you anyway and anytime she wants to.
We talked about takeaways in the articles before and that is a very powerful thing to use here. Just by stating to your girlfriend that “we are not having sex tonight”, you are sparking that initial dynamics which gets lost altogether in a relationship.
By showing her that she doesn’t have you even though she “had” you once or a couple of times, you spark her interest and she needs to put some effort into it. And this makes her want you more and more and more, making you the pray of her hunting.
Being flirty with behavior
Ah, my favorite “weapon” to use for sparking passion. This, in guys terminology, is called teasing. You can be playful with her and tease her behaviorally in several ways.
One of the most effective things you can do is to lean your head away from her when she tries to kiss you. This way, you are making yourself out of reach even if it is for a couple of seconds. But girls just love this because then they need to push and chase more.
You can use similar things like hugging her from behind and giving her just one (and I mean just one) long, passionate kiss on her neck or her mouth. This will send her a message that you care for her, but that if she wants it, she needs to work for it.
Or you can simply look her in the eyes for three seconds and then break eye contact.
There are multiple ways you can flirt with your behavior and these were just a couple of examples. Try out your ways and find what suits you (and your partner).
3. Being non-threatened by other guys
While we guys really a lot on physical appearance for our sexual attractions, for girls it is about behavior.
And nothing turns her on more than a confident man.
As we discussed in previous articles, girls test your character and personality in multiple ways and put you in high-pressure situations.
One situation like that is constant mentioning of guy colleagues and other guys in general. When you are not threatened by other guys, you show her that you are confident in yourself and that you trust not only her behavior and judgment but also that you are not needy.
When you are not jealous of other guys, you subconsciously send her a message that states “I believe that you are having the best time of your life with me. So I don’t worry about other guys because they can’t give you what I can give you.” And this confidence in your ability to show her a good time and not be threatened by other guys is a major turn-on for girls.
Also, you show her one more thing that makes her chase and want you even more.
If you feel that she can find someone who is better suited for her needs and she knows that you feel like this, then she is even more interested. Because that shows her that you are not needy, that you can leave almost anytime and that you can easily find someone else instead of her. This communicates that you are a high-value guy that girls want to hang around and want to have in their lives.
This combined with confidence in yourself is a major turn-on for them and they will chase you like crazy when you can show off this kind of behavior.
4. What is missed, is wanted
Imagine your favorite food right now. For me, it’s musaka – a special potato-meat-potato dish made in the Balkans.
And now think about eating that dish. Feels good ey?
Now imagine eating that dish every single day, 3 times a day for the rest of your life.
Suddenly it doesn’t look that appealing to you. It looks gross and you don’t want it that often.
But if you had it once every 15 days, it would probably be the best meal you had in those 15 days.
And that is the concept of “what is missed is wanted.”
When you make yourself constantly available and “usable”, then there is no time for the other side to crave for you. And time is of the essence here. You need to make yourself unavailable for a certain period of time so that the other side gets to miss you, your presence, your conversation skills, your flirty looks, and your warm breath when kissing her.
All of these get diminishing returns when used frequently so try to create scarcity with these or at least create smaller time frames when you two can enjoy yourself.
This will make her want you more, the time you two will spend together will have a bigger quality because you both will want it more and there will be FOMO- the fear of missing out.
Because if you only have 3 hours this entire week to hang out with her, then she should be really prepared for those 3 hours because there is not more of you in that week and if she somehow screws that up, you are gone for that week.
This is extremely healthy and is one of the secrets of long and successful marriages so see what suits you and your partner the best.
And we have come to the last point.
5. Be open and vulnerable
When you can show her and state your feelings and openness– the things that frighten you but also the things that excite you – then you will feel the biggest want and chase from the girl.
Because you are showing her that you are confident enough in a man you are that you can show her your feelings and vulnerabilities in an open manner. This is the last step because it takes a lot from most guys to open up and be vulnerable because society teaches us that guys need to always be though, never have and, God-forbid, show feelings and vulnerabilities. Because those are for girls, wusses and sissies.
And we guys buy into s*** for most of our lives, damaging ourselves and our relationships. But by learning to open up, we not only deal with our problems and bottled up feelings, but we also make ourselves more appealing to the other side. So try it to, go small and slow with it. And soon enough, you will start to love it and your partner too.
It’s great to chase, but sometimes we want to be the one that is chased. And for you to do that, you need these 5 elements: Grooming, Being flirty with words and body language, not being threatened by other guys, making yourself scarce and having her miss you and the last is to be open and vulnerable.
Let me know what are your experiences with these five.